Funeral Chain Exploits Demise of Tradition

 

By contrast, Newcomer Family Funeral Homes charges $2,585 on average, including all the basics, like embalming and a casket. Newcomer slashes prices by following the discounter's age-old formula: reducing margins to increase volume. If he prides himself on maintaining homes that are clean and comfortable, they nonetheless lack gilded amenities like grandfather clocks and grand pianos, as competitors are only too happy to note. "If you want the Kmart of the funeral industry, then go there," says Mike Gordon, a licensed funeral director at Drinkwine Family Mortuary, in Littleton, Colo., a Denver suburb.

Newcomer prefers another metaphor. "I want to be the Herb Kelleher of the funeral industry," he says, referring to the highly regarded chairman of Southwest Airlines Co. By modeling himself on the brash discounter, Newcomer appears to be waving a flag: that his tradition-bound competitors had better change their ways or he will bury them.

Laughter Amid Grief

If humor is anger's release, then a spoof by Mike Nichols and Elaine May highlights the antipathy of some Americans toward funeral costs. In the classic routine, rebroadcast as part of a 1996 PBS special, Charlie Maslow-Freene (Nichols) has come to the Long Dust funeral home to bury a loved one. He hands a $65 check, the advertised price, to a funeral-home employee, Miss Loomis (May).

Miss Loomis: Uh, before you go, Mr. Maslow-Freene, I was just wondering, would you be interested in some extras for the loved one?

Charlie Maslow-Freene: What kind of extras?

Miss Loomis: Well, how about a casket?

Charlie Maslow-Freene: Isn't that included in the funeral?

Miss Loomis: No.

Charlie Maslow-Freene: We have to have a casket.

Miss Loomis: Yes, it looks better.

Charlie Maslow-Freene: How much?

Miss Loomis: We have three prices: $1,243, $768, and $14.98.

Charlie Maslow-Freene: Um, may I ask...What do those prices represent?

Miss Loomis: That's mahogany, oak, and nubby plywood.

Charlie Maslow-Freene: Nubby plywood--tell me, uh, what kind of an appearance does that make?

Miss Loomis: Cheap.

Charlie Maslow-Freene: I'll take the oak.

© Nichols and May and Castle Hill Productions Inc. All rights reserved.

The power of tradition

How strong is the hold of the established neighborhood funeral home on the allegiance of the American consumer? Are funeral-buying habits changing and, if so, why? To explore those questions, staff writer Marc Ballon recently spoke with Dwayne Banks of Abt Associates in Bethesda, Md., who is an expert on the funeral and health-care industries.

Q: What is the American attitude toward funerals?

A: Americans are fairly conservative when it comes to death. They like tradition.

Q: You have said most people don't do comparison shopping before burying their loved ones. How do people decide?

A: People will actually look to see whether or not there is a particular funeral director in the neighborhood, and they'll go to that person. They tend to go to someone that's nearby, which in most cases seems to be someone that's part of their social network or someone who's part of the social network that they've had experience with.

Q: Who would buy a discount funeral?

A: I think a lot of upper-middle-class, educated folks would be quite attracted to a discount funeral, because they can afford to be. They're fairly secure in life. I don't think a poor person wants a poor funeral.

Q: Why?

A: If you can't provide for someone in life, you can at least give them a really nice send-off. So that what you can't provide for them in life, maybe you can make up for by providing it in death.

Q: Are baby boomers any different in their funeral-buying habits?

A: Many of them do shop around, because there's more information out there.

Q: What information?

A: The industry does a significant amount of advertising. If you look in the newspapers, you see advertisements for cremation services, cemeteries, and funeral homes. So the advertising is there.

Q: Are baby boomers more inclined to shop for funeral services?

A: Yes, because today people are mobile. They're less tied to communities now. They're less tied to tradition.

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