If You Want It So Much, Why Don't You Have It?
BY Marla Tabaka
I used to believe that if I ever became 'successful' that my life would change in ways that felt uncomfortable to me. It wasn't a conscious belief but it sure was keeping me "stuck." I made this discovery when I was developing my LifeMap Coaching Process™ and doing some of The Work. From there I made another discovery that would change my life and the way I coach forever.
Through the process that Iwas developing I was able to realize that my image of wealth was not such a pretty picture. I'm not sure when or why I painted that picture, but it was stopping me from moving forward.
I wasn't attracting enough clients
Money was slipping through my fingers
I felt 'stuck' and fearful about taking the risks associated with growing my business
Below are some of the questions I asked myself at the time. Before asking them of yourself, take a moment to think about where you might be 'stuck.' Do you find yourself making excuses or procrastinating about certain things in your life or business? Think of one goal, desire or dream that you have not yet achieved and answer these questions:
What are the negative consequences that would occur when you achieve your desire?
What will you expect of yourself once you accomplish this goal?
What will others expect of you?
Your answers may provide insights around your limiting beliefs, but that's just the beginning. How do we change these beliefs and knock down the brick wall? Sometimes the simple awareness alone is enough to break through the wall, but my next discovery was that we need help with our strong limiting beliefs. We can't always change with shear willpower because the things that keep us from moving forward are stored at the cellular level. That's right, the negative thoughts, worry, and stress can come from a level deep inside of us that we can't just decide to change. These come from negative life experiences that we literally download into our cellular memory. They become a part of who we are and letting go isn't always easy.
There are a number of methods that address this problem; the method that I use in my life and as a coach is called The Emotional Freedom Techniques, or EFT. The success rate with EFT is very high and I find that its results are permanent. Whatever method you choose, it's important that people understand that the procrastination, fear, and stress that comes from these embedded beliefs do not make us weak or inferior in any way. We all build walls around ourselves at some point in our life; it's just the way the human mind works. It's OK to reach out for help, breaking through the walls alone is not easy, and sometimes it's impossible.
Are you ready to create change, once and for all? What steps will you take?
I am conducting a full day event on April 24th in the Chicagoland area where attendees will learn this powerful technique and how to take down their walls – once and for all! Learn more here!
MARLA TABAKA is a small-business adviser who helps entrepreneurs around the globe grow their businesses well into the millions. She speaks widely on combining strategic and creative thinking for optimum success and happiness. @MarlaTabaka