How to Navigate Taboo Topics at Work

With all the talk of the U.S. election coming up this November, you may have noticed that in many contexts, talking politics is not acceptable. Talking politics and other taboo topics such as religion and sex at work is often a no-no.

As an executive communication coach, I know that understanding how to navigate taboo topics at work is an important subject for many executives. “Taboo topics” is one of the most searched terms on my website and one of my most downloaded podcast episodes. Clearly, people have questions.

Understanding taboo topics

The word “taboo” comes from the Tongan “tapu,” the Fijian “tabu,” or the Polynesian “tabu,” and it translates to unacceptable, prohibited, disallowed, or forbidden. What qualifies as a taboo topic and how people respond to it varies across cultures and contexts. Consider taboo topics mentioned by a stand-up comedian, versus by an executive in a formal meeting. Taboo topics also change over time. Consider how the acceptability of piercings and tattoos has evolved.

When people talk about taboo topics at work, they can evoke strong emotions, lead to conflicts, or breach professional boundaries. While every workplace has its own culture and norms, several common taboo topics are generally avoided in professional environments.

Here are five examples of typical taboo topics at work:

1. Politics: Discussions about political affiliations, elections, or government policies can quickly become heated and divisive.
2. Religion: Religious beliefs and practices are deeply personal and can lead to uncomfortable situations or feelings of exclusion.
3. Sexual orientation and identity: While promoting inclusivity is important, delving into personal aspects of someone’s sexual orientation or identity can be intrusive.
4. Personal finances: Talking about salaries, debts, or personal investments can create feelings of envy, resentment, or invasion of privacy.
5. Health issues: Discussing personal health problems, especially in detail, can make colleagues uncomfortable and raise privacy concerns.

Navigating taboo topics: A step-by-step guide

Think about the last time someone brought up a taboo topic at work, whether it was politics, religion, sexual orientation, or something else. What did you do? What did the other people in the room do? Did you laugh nervously? Open your eyes wide in disbelief? Or look away and avoid eye contact?

Here are five steps to follow when taboo topics come up at work.

1. Recognize the taboo topic: Awareness is the first step. Recognize when a conversation is veering into taboo territory. Pay attention to your discomfort and the reactions of others around you.
2. Acknowledge boundaries: Politely recognize the situation, particularly if you know someone else is uncomfortable but perhaps not willing to speak up. Set boundaries when a taboo topic arises. This could be as simple as, “Let’s not go there,” or you could be more direct and say something like, “I prefer not to discuss politics at work,” or “Let’s keep the conversation professional.” Keep it brief and non-accusatory.
3. Redirect the conversation: Steer the conversation back to a neutral or work-related topic. For example, if a colleague brings up personal finances, you might respond with, “That’s interesting, but I’m curious about your thoughts on our latest project.”
4. Educate and inform: If appropriate, gently educate colleagues about the potential discomfort or inappropriateness of certain topics. Ideally, this is done privately. Regardless, it should be non-confrontational. Chances are they do not understand the topic is offensive or hurtful to others. Try something like, “I understand this is an important issue for you, but discussing it here might make some of us uncomfortable.”
5. Seek support from management: This is always the last step. Seek formal support only if you’ve tried the If a particular taboo topic becomes a recurring issue, seek support from management or HR. They can help reinforce workplace policies and ensure a respectful workplace.

Last, when it comes to navigating taboo topics, know when to exit the conversation. When you say, “I think it’s best if we continue this conversation another time,” you might be saving not just yourself, but others from an uncomfortable or even intolerable situation. If a discussion becomes too contentious, it’s okay to excuse yourself.