Whether you want to get healthier, stop using social media so much, improve your relationships, be happier, write a book, or start a business -- willpower won't help you with any of these things.
Willpower is a broken approach to thriving and success
"Willpower is for people who are still uncertain about what they want to do." -- Helia
If you're required to exert willpower to do something, there is an obvious internal conflict. You want to eat the cookie, but you also want to be healthy. Environment versus goal.
According to psychological research, your willpower is like a muscle. It's a finite resource that depletes with use. As a result, by the end of your strenuous days, your willpower muscles are exhausted and you're left to your naked and defenseless self -- with zero control to stop the night-time munchies and time wasters.
At least, that's what you've been taught.
Clearly, the research on willpower explains human behavior, but only on the surface level . The fact that willpower is required comes from two more fundamental sources :
- You don't know what you want, and are thus internally conflicted.
- You haven't committed to something and created conditions that facilitate your commitment.
What do you really want?
"Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If your life requires willpower, you haven't fully determined what you want.Because once you make a decision, the internal debate is over. As Michael Jordan has said, "Once I made a decision, I never thought about it again."
After you decide what you want, the decision is made. Thus, all future decisions regarding that matter have also been made. No questions.
Are you committed?
How do you know if you're truly committed to something?
When it comes to achieving goals, commitment involves:
- Investing upfront
- Making it public
- Setting a timeline
- Installing several forms of feedback/accountability
- Removing or altering everything in your environment that opposes your commitment
If you're committed to running a marathon, you're going to put everything in place to make sure it happens. You're not going to leave it up to chance.
You're going to start by signing up for a race (investment). You're going to make it public (phase one of accountability). You're going to get a running partner who holds you accountable. You're going to track your progress (feedback) and account your progress to your accountability partner. Lastly, you're going to remove things in your life that keep you from running.
Commitment means you build external defense systems around your goals.Your internal resolve, naked to an undefended and opposing environment is not commitment.
Creating conditions that make success inevitable
No matter how much internal resolve you have, you will fail to change your life if you don't change your environment.
This is where the willpower approach fails. The willpower approach doesn't focus on changing the environment, but instead, on increasing personal efforts to overcome the current environment. What ends up happening?Eventually you succumb to your environment despite your greatest efforts to resist.
The environment is more powerful than your internal resolve. As a human-being, you are the product of your environment.
Consequently, the best use of your choices is consciously designing environments that facilitate your commitments. Actually, if you're really committed to something, this is exactly what you'll do.
If you want to become a professional rock-climber, you need to surround yourself with professional rock-climbers and orient your whole lifestyle to that goal.
Napoleon Hill once said, "When your desires are strong enough, you will appear to possess superhuman powers to achieve." In a similar way, Bill Walsh said, "If your why is strong enough you will figure out how!"
If you're required to use willpower:
- You haven't made up your mind.
- Your desire (your why) for your goals isn't strong enough.
- You haven't fully committed to what you're going to do.
- Your environment opposes your goals. Thus, you haven't created an environment that makes your goals inevitable.
Your environment -- including the people you surround yourself with -- is the clearest indicator of who you are and who you're becoming.