I don't believe in negative people. I believe that sometimes people are just going through some negative stuff. Hurt people tend to hurt people.
It's been my experience that the way to obliterate negative people in your life is to be the best version of yourself. Your shifted state of mind, your full state of being will change the world around you.
So let's get to it. Here are 10 ways to obliterate the negative people in your life:
1. Be self-aware.
In a black and white world filled with "this side" or "that side," being self-aware is a nuanced grey area. Knowing your strengths and your weaknesses can be a super power when dealing with negative people.
Have the conviction to know when you're right, and let it go. Or being smart enough to know what you don't know, and opening up to outside opinions can endear you to the most "Negative Nelly" in the room.
Think about it.
If you've done enough work on yourself, you will know what makes you happy. You may be able to tolerate and work with a negative person more easily. Of you may make a more swift and decisive move to leave a negative situation if you're in a situation that does not suit your strengths.
Do what makes you happy, and the negative people will slip into the darkness.
2. Be generous.
We've heard of kill them with kindness. But I prefer killing them with generosity. Be generous of your spirit, your mind, and your time. Offer to help, to lend an ear, and to lend an open heart.
If you can get to the core of what has made the negative person in your life so upset, perhaps you can work on a solution together. So offer yourself, and see the negativity melt away.
3. Have discipline
Your discipline is your stamina. You can tolerate anything life throws at you if you stick to your regiment. When you're disciplined with yourself, your mind, your body and your soul, nobody can sway you.
If you encounter negative people, they won't be able to set you off your determined path. You won't allow them to make you throw in the towel.
4. Have self-confidence.
If you know that you're good at your job, nothing anyone can say will change how you feel about your work. You will be able to define your true north and have faith that you will find your way. Negativity will bounce off you.
If that negativity is coming from more than one person at work, then if you have the confidence in your abilities, you can leave. No need to stay in an abusive work/life relationship.
5. Be kind.
I began by saying that hurt people, hurt people. So often our reaction to negativity is more negativity. But simply lending an ear to see what may have that person riled up could be enough to quell the fire of negativity.
So put yourself in their shoes, and be kind.
6. Lead with common sense.
Some of the most intelligent people I know have no clue how to navigate life. They're brilliant, but they're social awkward. Being able to create an algorithm won't make you a great friend. But, being able to see the bigger picture in an office where someone may be negative will help your immeasurably.
7. Have a sense of humor.
Have you ever been in the middle of an argument of confrontation and one person cracks up. The tension diffuses and everyone enjoys the release of laughter. Sometimes the lid is on the pressure cooker too tight.
Lighten up, share a laugh and watch the negatively melt away.
8. Live with integrity.
Many people who are negative (especially in a work environment) have been lied to. Perhaps they're doing things at work that they're not being compensated for. Or they're underpaid. Or their boss has overlooked their performance for another.
The best way to insulate you from negativity like this is to conduct yourself with the utmost integrity.
If someone is genuinely upset with you personally, they will (most likely) approach you with the same integrity that you offer those around you. This will quell any silly being the back banter etc.
9. Be emotionally open.
Many negative people are suffering. They can't process their own emotions, so they lash out at those around them. If you're aware of your emotions you can set the emotional tempo of your office.
Offering warmth and compassion to those around you will allow others the freedom to act in compassionate ways as well.
10. Be courageous.
Reaching out to the negative people around you is a scary premise. Most times these toxic people can create a black hole of negativity. They affect those around them, and poison the culture of your company.
You have to be courageous to remedy the situation, remove yourself from the situation, or (if your the boss) remove them from the situation.
Wrapping it all up:
If you work on these ten things first, it will be that much easier when confronting negativity. You have the power to shift the whole culture in your office, and in your life.
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