Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.
They'll never open a Museum of Exciting Conference Calls.
These disembodied forms of communication limit the input, which limits the output.
Who, indeed, sits on a conference call and does nothing else?
Everyone is tapping away on their keyboards, writing emails, surfing Facebook or even booking a vacation because conference calls chew on the soul.
A New Jersey woman, however, found a different form of entertainment.
As North Jersey.com reports, the woman had a flutter on the Divine Fortune game at the SugarHouse Online Casino.
There, she found divine fortune. Well, the relatively ungodly amount of $287,945.
Yes, for just a $2 bet.
The woman, understandably, hasn't been named.
And I fear a little skepticism might flutter across the celestial skies when I tell you that the story emerged from Rush Street Interactive, the online casino's operator.
What better way to market your perfectly legal wares than to suggest they can bring you perfectly legal riches while you're sitting in a perfectly dull meeting?
The woman apparently posted about her good fortune in the SugarHouse Casino chat room.
She claimed she screamed out loud when she secured her riches.
I wonder what everyone else on the call thought. I wonder if she told her co-workers what had happened.
Or perhaps she said: "I'm sorry, but I can't believe this! The Jets now have Ivy League data experts in their front office!"
Well, that would have been more appropriate for a conference call than, say: "Hah! I've just made enough money to dump this job! I hate you all!"
The casino claims the woman had been a regular online gambler since January.
It may be that, if you've ever stared for more than three minutes at people playing the slots in, say, Vegas, you think it's the most mind- and body-numbing pursuit since picking grains of rice from the floor, one by one, after a child or a pet has spilled them.
I fear, though, that those of a gambling mind might mutter: "Sure, but is it any more dull than a conference call?"