Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.
Airlines are trying.
Sometimes, it may not seem as if they are.
But, in some small corner of their head offices, they want to come up with the occasional idea to surprise and hopefully garner a little positive press.
Let's celebrate, then, the latest wheeze from American Airlines.
We'll start with the good news.
It's available to all passengers. Yes, even you who can't even be bothered to pay an extra $55 for a window seat in economy class.
The perk itself is really quite something.
It's a way of avoiding the terrible nuisance of getting to the airport by cab and maneuvering your way through all the other hassles associated with airport life.
American is therefore offering a partnership with a company called Blade.
It'll meet you in downtown New York or Los Angeles -- the only two cities where this perk is currently on offer -- and whisk you by helicopter to the airport.
What could be better? You could look down on the Van Nuys expressway and think: "There, but for the grace of American Airlines, go I."
Then, the service will slide you through some of the more laborious parts of security, so that the beginning and end of your journey can be effortless. (The service works on arrival at JFK and LAX too.)
I repeat this really is available to any booked on American, regardless of seat and row number.
I have so far omitted the one slight kink. It's not free.
If you're in New York, you might pay at least $695 for the helicopter. If you can find more people to accompany you, they might only pay $195. (LAX may not be cheaper.)
Yes, it's like flying an American Express Platinum Card.
In fact, you have to find five more people, because the deal is only for full choppers.
As for avoiding all the security malarkey by booking the Five Star Service, well, that'll set you back another $350.
It depends, though, on what's important to you.
You could indeed, book a cheap economy class flight -- and there are quite a few around right now -- and indulge yourself with at least a few minutes in a helicopter.
That may still work out to be a lot less than booking in first class.
Perhaps it's just like luxury stores.
Some people go in just to buy cheaper items such as a scarf or a wallet.
That's their little taste of luxury.
A helicopter to the airport might be yours.