Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.
Once upon a time, it was easy to teach the world to sing.
The world, you see, had a very good idea how to do that already.
These days, things are more complicated. Many brands try to make lives better simply by making customers feel good about their product.
Coca-Cola, however, has often had more exalted designs. It likes to make universal statements about, you know, humanity and the power of sugary, carbonated drinks.
Its latest attempt is quite something.
The company believes the world is in a fractious state. Apparently, we're all shouting at each other. We all believe we're right. And amid all this shouting and righteousness, we don't see that the world is falling apart all around us.
Oddly, I seem to get precisely this impression from, oh, just two minutes on Twitter.
Or thirty seconds of speech from almost every one of the world's poiticians.
What role can Coke play in this? Well, its new ad believes it has the spiritual answer: we need to be more open.
Yes, it appears that Coca-Cola may have failed to observe what's been happening ever since Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg insisted world harmony comes from humans beings more "open and connected."
As long as you're more open and connected on Facebook, that is.
In this ad, even superheroes are fighting for the right to to be seen to be right.
It takes Orange Is The New Black's Natasha Lyonne to inject:
The thing is, everyone's obsessed with being right about everything. You know, have you asked yourself, 'could I be the one who's wrong?' Maybe things would change for the better.
A commendable homily, of course. But do we really want brands to speak to us this way? It's as if the celestial brand has the solution to the world's problems, if only we stupid earthlings would stop our screaming and listen.
It's all a touch reminiscent of the ad where Kendall Jenner offered a riot police officer an olive branch. Well, a can of Pepsi, actually. That didn't go so well.
And still one wonders what Coke's actual role is in this. The only message here is that "Everything's Better When We're Open."
Congenital realists might suggest that being excessively open has led us far too often to being taken advantage of and hacked. As well as phished and even catfished.
How did a bottle of Coca-Cola help us then? Did sharing one do us any good? Does anyone even do this, other than in Coke ads?
For me, though, there's a core product essence that's a touch incongruous here.
Over here are so many people acting in an overly excitable way. And over there is a not very good for you, highly caffeinated drink telling us not to do that -- when, some might say, overly caffeinated drinks don't entirely help.
This doesn't entirely make sense. Not even emotional sense.
Of course, I could be entirely wrong about this.