Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek. 


You're probably already suffering from exhaustion.

Life has sapped your energies lately. Then along came the presidential campaign.

This nibbled at your nerves and gobbled your sang-froid.

Please don't worry.

There's a video that's out there -- somewhere out there -- that's going to change your life.

This isn't some clip of Tony Robbins moving you to a higher plane of you.

This is a video that promises the savior is among us, ready to lead us from the wilderness to the wild, wild West that we've always craved.

As USA Today reports, it was created by an organization called Immigrants-4-Trump.

What these immigrants did was take the trailer for the video game Mass Effect 2 and create a mass effect that the masses have never experienced before.

I know this because a few seconds of it were enthusiastically posted to Instagram by Republican presidential candidate Donald J. Trump.

"One very specific man might be all that stands between humanity and the greatest threat of our brief existence," says the portentous voiceover, over an image of Trump drinking from a water bottle.

I hadn't been aware that Hillary Clinton constituted the greatest threat of our brief existence. I'd always thought that was Facebook.

Still, the great tragedy of this video is that it's been removed from YouTube, apparently because of copyright concerns. However, you can still view the whole thing here.

You might think you can't learn anything from this dramatic oeuvre. You will surely be mistaken.

First, if even a few seconds of it move you, you can become aware of how powerful an emotion fear can be.

Scare people enough and they'll believe you are their savior. Even if right now you're merely the deputy assistant financial controller.

Second, confidence can take you a long way.

If you're confident enough to scare people, if you're confident enough to promise them the impossible by, say, turning back time to 1947, they may offer you unquenchable support.

Third, there's a terrible claim, repeated so often over the years, that aiming for the lowest common denominator will never lose you money.

Watch this video at least 40 times and decide for yourself if that's true.

There's one more thing this filmic masterpiece can teach you.

If you happen to have a hugely egotistical boss, you can flatter him into believing that he's even greater than he thinks he is.

I fancy that this video might be a parody, made specifically with the goal of getting Trump to retweet it.

This he duly did.

"We're going to win so much you're going to get sick and tired of it," Trump says in the video.

This is one video you can never get sick and tired of. Because it teaches you so much.