Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.
Alright, enough with the lectures.
Enough with the complaints, the gripes and, oh, the polite-not-polite advice.
It's time for a different attitude toward millennials.
It's time to suck it up. It's time to suck up to them.
You'll think I've drifted toward delusion. You'll think the frenzied political climate has addled my innards.
You'd be right.
But not to the extent that I can't see the vestiges of reality that peek through the belching rhetoric.
As my evidence, I present Chloe Moretz.
The former child actor is now a millennial actor.
At the Democratic National Convention, she decided to become a political actor too.
You need range to get the best parts, after all.
So there she was making a speech on the very same night as Hillary Clinton.
Moretz had a few simple things to say.
For example: "I'm a Millennial -- a member of the largest generation of Americans since the Baby Boom."
That is powerful Big Data. There was more
"Nearly four out of five young people stayed home in the 2014 Congressional election," she said.
Now we're getting to the crux.
Millennials can (and do) sway elections.
They can do it by voting. Or they can do it by not bothering to vote at all.
Many older types -- even many of the 42 percent who claim to be independent -- have made up their minds as to which direction to send America.
For some, these directions are called Bliss and Abyss.
For others, they're merely Bad and Slightly Less Bad.
But for all that those who regularly shave in many parts believe they see the lay of the land and know the candidates, the issues and the dangers, it's millennials who represent the final word.
Or the final silence.
You can deride them all you will.
But if, as Moretz would like them to do, they bother to waft to their local polling place (if their iPhones can direct them there), it will be their vision that you will have to follow.
It will be their instinct that will tell America: "No, not this way. That way."
There's something beautifully healthy (and frightening) about that.
For Moretz, the choice is stark.
She said that if millennials do bother to vote: "We can elect a president who will fight to give every American a chance to graduate from college debt-free. We can elect a president who will fight for equal pay for equal work."
You'd think that in this world dictated by 1s and zeros, equal pay for equal work would be a given. But it's not.
Given that she was speaking at the DNC, you can guess who is her preferred candidate.
"My amazing mother became a single parent when I was 13 years old," she explained. "It wasn't easy. She had to balance a job and caring for her family. Imagine the difference equal pay could make for today's working moms and their families."
Fine words, of course.
But let's exit toward Brexit.
The single biggest reason why the UK decided to unstick itself from the bosom of the EU was because millennials didn't have the interest or gumption to add their soprano to the country's voice.
Indeed, it was the under-24s who didn't go to the polls and then marched in protest because the wrong side (in their eyes) won.
Only 36 percent of 18-24s even planned to cast a ballot.
Imagine, then, how many bothered on the day.
Please consider that America's future is actually, literally and daringly in the hands of this same young generation.
They will either heed Chloe Moretz's call. Or they will stay in bed. The whole day.
Only to wake up some time around 9pm and wonder what on earth they have -- or haven't -- done.
Meanwhile the rest of America will, I suspect, be doing of a lot of praying.
Personally, I rather like the thought of millennials being the bosses of such a vast enterprise.
I wonder what they'll do with such power.