Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek

It's a given.

The problem with givens, though is that sometimes we don't stop to think what's so obvious about them.

We take for granted that being rich is a truly great thing. For some people, it's the only thing.

They believe that monetary riches bring all the other riches with them, as if it's a two-for-one deal.

Get money, and then get yachts and Aston Martins and fine wines and wonderful food. Oh, and love, of course.

Can this possibly be true?

In his Saturday Night Live monologue, Curb Your Enthusiasm star Larry David explained what it is to rise from poor schmuck to rich prick.

These words are very important.

David explained that he auditioned for the show years ago and was awful.

"Those were the days when I was just a poor schmuck," he said. "As opposed to now. Now, I'm a rich prick."

It's odd, he mused how the word prick always follows the word rich, while only the poor can be schmucks.

Poor prick just doesn't sound right.

"If you're poor, you're a schmuck," he explained. "Why else would you be poor?"

Now that he's a rich prick and not a poor schmuck, is he happier? Not that much.

But a little.

It's true that when you get rich, your get new friends. They're all pricks, naturally.

You learn to enjoy that, I suppose. For David, however, he now has to leave wherever he is. It's a veritably postcoital feeling.

Perhaps this is caused by the idea that it's hard to be in a room full of pricks for too long.

However, even if you're a rich prick, with all the benefits of choice this entails, there are redeeming features.

Your rich prick friends still care about their fellow prick.

"Every time I'm dating, my friends always say to me: 'Aren't you concerned that she's only going out with you because you have some money and you're on TV?'"

David doesn't worry about that at all. When you're a rich prick, there isn't the need to worry.

"Why else would she go out with me?" David said. "Of course that's why she's going out with me. That's one of the benefits. That's why I did this in the first place. What, do you think she has a penchant for old, bald men?"

There's a certain release, it seems, when you reach rich prickdom.

You absolve anyone from having to like you for who you really are.

"She's supposed to like me for myself?" wondered David. "I don't even like me for myself."

When you're rich, you can stop trying to be a good person. You've already achieved the insulation you need from the pressures of trying to be good.

You're a rich prick. You embrace it. You bathe in it.

So there you have it. The best thing about being rich is that you can forget about being good. You can forget about trying to impress others, because you've done it already just by being rich.

If you do try and impress others, just for the hell of it, they'll even let you pretend you're democratic socialist Bernie Sanders.

And, even better, they'll pay you for it.

Published on: Feb 7, 2016
The opinions expressed here by Inc.com columnists are their own, not those of Inc.com.