Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.
Or perhaps you wish everyone would just stop and activate their brains for once.
Perhaps, then, you didn't notice that on Election Night, Delta Air Lines was desperate to talk to you.
The airline released an ad that teetered along that corporate high wire between the unctuous, the desperately sincere and the slightly risible.
Here was Viola Davis making what sounded like a campaign speech:
"You hear about how 'We're a nation divided.' Yet from where we sit we see no such thing."
Immediately some might groan that on every Delta flight there's an actual divider between first class and the rest.
They might also groan that the airline is keen to charge every single passenger a different price for a different seat at a different time.
In business, we call that divide and conquer.
Rise above the noise of the day and you'll see: there's a lot more that connects us than divides us. pic.twitter.com/rGc6I6L8tp-- Delta (@Delta) November 6, 2018
But back to Delta's Davis:
"We see half a million people -- today alone -- stitching together some supposedly very divided states."
"We see people working across party lines, state lines. Yes, even airlines."
Oh, but is that true? Airlines aren't exactly keen on, say, checking your bag through to a connecting flight on a rival airline.
Delta's closing argument is a touch more persuasive:
"If you really want to see what this country is made of, maybe it's best to go see it for yourself."
Is Delta really using the election as a way to encourage people to fly?
CEO Ed on LinkedIn:Bastian explained what he had in mind,
"Today marks an important day for the U.S. after months of punditry and noise. At times like this I think about #Delta's mission of bringing the world closer together. I've long believed our responsibility is a noble one; oftentimes, it's what keeps us going in the hectic whirlwind of the airline business."
Where have I heard the "bringing the world closer together"?
Oh, I remember. It was only last week in an ad from, look, United Airlines.
It really is quite odd how airlines emphasize their noble pursuits, while at the same time doing so much to make the passenger experience less comfortable.
Why, only this week, a story emerged of a Delta passenger who says he was forced to clean up dog excrement on his seat, as a flight attendant said it wasn't her problem.
It seems that when airlines make grand pronouncements about their missions, it's easy to see them in the same light as those other grand pronouncers: politicians.