Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.

Have you noticed people walking out of your local Starbucks, their eyes bulging like demented beings of yore?

Have you heard ululating in the streets, along the lines of: "Oh, my God. It's changing color! What do I do?!"

You have, then, reached some understanding of the phenomenon that is the Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino.

Should you have been unaccountably stuck in a Peet's for the last three days, listening to your barista explaining his university thesis on fornication and the pregnant chicken, you might not know that Starbucks has released this concoction for the masses to bathe in.

Socially, you understand.

"Once only found in enchanted forests, unicorns have been popping up in social media with shimmering unicorn-themed food and drinks," gushes Starbucks in its blurb.

On social media, people have been gushing too. It's the color change that enchants them. As Instagrammer Xandarbarbarian mused: "The flavor and color changing Unicorn Frappuccino from Starbucks. Doesn't matter that it isn't coffee-based, I'm sure there's enough sugar in it to get me through the morning."

I'm sure he's right.

Starbucks, though, is heightening the craziness of this craze by only allowing it to be sold for four days -- between April 19-23. Legends are made of this.

I imagine four days is all that its baristas can take of customers oohing, aahing and skipping around the stores. After all, it wants to get them out as soon as possible, so that the mobile orderers can get their drinks.

Some stores though, are doing lunatic things themselves. I noticed one in Burlingame, California that posted an image of someone who seems to have dressed in a unicorn shirt in order to hold the Unicorn Frappuccino.

What have we come to? Dreaming of legends because our reality is just too painful?

That sounds about right.

Published on: Apr 19, 2017