Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.
It's that time of year.
I don't mean the end of summer. Nor indeed, the imminent fear that the world is ending.
Instead, it's the time when real human beings become obsessed with Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Lattes.
At least, that's what I'm told by those who are already experiencing these feelings.
Naturally, Starbucks is coy about when these portents of fall will begin to appear.
On the company's website, it merely says: "Seasonal offering." Without mentioning when the season begins.
So a kind-hearted web developer called Patrick Johnson has created a Pumpkin Spice Latte tracker.
It's called Is It Pumpkin Spice Latte Season.
Johnson told Elite Daily that he scoured the web to see whether some helpful web developer had already created a tracker that would assist Americans in finding their nearest PSL (as they're known in the emotional world of Starbucks).
There wasn't one, so he stepped up.
Starbucks itself, of course, isn't immune from the tease.
It created an official Pumpkin Spice Latte Twitter account, where a shades-sporting PSL cup is merciless.
Its latest tweet: "I CAN'T TELL YOU YES I CAN NO I CAN'T STARBUCKS FACEBOOK SEPTEMBER 1ST THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY AH!!!"
Those capital letters express so many emotions and generate so many more inside my delicate soul.
Not all of them are positive.
Does it mean that PSLs will slowly begin to appear in a quaint game of Whack-A-Latte from tomorrow?
Or does it mean that Starbucks will merely announce tomorrow when the PSL might be available? And, indeed, where.
I encourage Johnson to create a chat room on his new tracker.
I feel sure that many PSL obsessionists will be desperate to express their hopes, fears and personal proclivities even before tomorrow.
And what if tomorrow never comes? I mean in PSL terms.
I CAN'T TELL YOU YES I CAN NO I CAN'T STARBUCKS FACEBOOK SEPTEMBER 1ST THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY AH!!!-- Pumpkin Spice Latte (@TheRealPSL) August 28, 2017