Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek.


There's the person who spreads his laptop out on his little table in coach and nudges you for the whole flight.

There's the person who has a screaming baby and wants you to appreciate just how wonderful their screaming baby is.

There's the snot-nosed little worm who thinks it's cool to play video games with the volume on full-blast.

These are all people who, in my world of justice, should be sent to jail for their behavior on planes.

There is, however, a new candidate.

Silicon Valley actor and comedian Kumail Nanjiani offered a series of tweets about the man sitting near him on a cross-country flight.

"I was on a plane a couple of days ago. A guy took off his jeans & lounged around in his boxers with his feet up on the wall," tweeted Nanjiani.

I pause for your regurgitation. I pause also for you to consider what are the chances that this boxered oaf works in tech.

How long might you have tolerated such behavior before suggesting the man find his manners and his trousers?

How long would you have waited before asking a member of the cabin crew to suggest he put his pants back on?

It seems that this went on for four hours before anyone said anything.

"After 4 hours, a flight attendant finally said 'Could you please put your feet down? People are walking through here. 40 second stare down," tweeted Nanjiani.

A stare-down that didn't produce results, apparently.

"This guy was rude to the staff the entire time. If he didn't get the flight attendant's attention, he would slam his fist on the armrest," Nanjiani continued. (Yes, this wasn't coach.)

It seems this man refused to anything until shortly before landing.

Then: "Descending. No jeans. Right before landing, he stands in the aisle, in defiance of decency & lighted seatbelt signs. He puts on his jeans."

And still no one did anything.

"He walks off the plane. No police is waiting for him. No justice. He adjusts his belt, and the monster blends into a crowd," tweeted Nanjiani.

Some who read these descriptions assumed that the apparently purple lighting from Nanjiani's photos suggested this was a Virgin America flight.

"Ppl think it's Virgin. It's not!" tweeted Nanjiani. "His USB charger made disco lights the whole time, bathing his thighs in reds, blues, greens!" He added a video that's painful to witness.

American Airlines recently emitted an ad campaign, telling people to behave better on planes. This seemed gauche, considering how poorly airlines have behaved toward passengers of late.

There does come a point, however, at which certain basics ought to be observed.

I nominate this passenger as the worst passenger in the world.

Have you seen worse? Please offer your own nomination. I will hold my nose.