I'm all for shortcuts that make your life easier. With all the noise and distraction in this world, you shouldn't have to listen to people saying abysmally stupid things. Idiotic remarks take your attention away from things that are really important and use up brain cells that would be better spent on something else.

Therefore, to make everyone's life easier, here are six sentence "lead-ins" that invariably indicate that next few words to spout from other person's mouth will be a total waste of time and energy:

1. "I'm no scientist, but..."

This always introduces an opinion about some aspect of science that's not supported by the science. People who use this dodge know they're laying a line of bullsh*t because if they didn't know that the science doesn't support their opinion, otherwise they'd just quote a scientist or scientific research.

2. "I'm not a racist, but..."

Only racists begin a sentence with the denial that they're racists. If they weren't racists, they wouldn't feel the need to pretend that they aren't.

3. "Many people are saying that..."

Just because many people--even a majority of people--think something is true doesn't mean it's true. Quite the contrary, the general publis is so gullible that kpublic opinion on matters of factual accuracy is usually dead wrong.

4. "Kids today need to learn that..."

Every generation thinks the previous generation is full of crap. Any remark following this lead-in is guaranteed to be ridiculous because, as the old saying goes, you can't put old heads on young shoulders. Everyone's perspective changes over time and you can no more drag a youngster into wisdom than you can yank a sapling into a tree. 

5. "Well, at least I didn't..."

People use this lead-in to reframe their stupid or evil actions by comparing them to something even worse that somebody else has done... as if that makes any difference.

6. "Yeah, but what about..."

Similar but not exactly like #5. When people can't summon a decent argument, they'll try to change the subject by bringing up something that's completely irrelevant.

Published on: May 31, 2019
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