By all means, consider actually feeling your emotions whenever they arrive.
However, it's important that you do not let how you feel control any situation you find yourself in.
When it comes to knowing how to regulate emotions, author, speaker, and entrepreneur, Hal Elrod, has a few choice words on how to do so. In fact, Elrod specifically has three:
Can't Change It.
When he was in his late teens, Elrod started a career in direct sales. Elrod would face rejection after rejection, failed goals, canceled orders, and other disappointments. In this position, there were many opportunities for Elrod to let his emotions get the best of him in the face of failure.
But, according to one powerful rule he learned from his boss, there was an easy and simple way to regulation his emotions during trying times. According to the "5-minute rule," when things go wrong, it's okay to be completely negative--but not for more than five minutes. With this rule, Elrod learned to set a timer, moan, complain, whine, and express every negative emotion he liked during a period of five minutes, and then took a deep breath to say three remarkably powerful words:
Can't Change It.
"It's simply an acknowledgement that I can't change what's already happened, so there's no value in wishing it were different," he explains.
This rule actually became critical at a time completely unrelated to his career as well. A year and a half after starting in sales, Elrod and his girlfriend were hit head on by a drunk driver, who was speeding 80 mph down the wrong side of a freeway. While Elrod's girlfriend escaped with minor injuries, he was in terrible shape--pinned inside the wreckage until rescue workers could extract him.
Because of this horrific car accident, he was declared clinically dead for 6 minutes, suffered multiple internal injuries, and was told he would never walk again. He flatlined two more times during the course of seven surgeries to repair his broken body.
"In the span of 5 minutes, I woke up and was told I would never walk again, I had 11 broken bones, permanent brain damage...so I went,
Can't Change It."
Elrod refused to be miserable because of his unchangeable circumstance. He chose to accept the worst-case scenario and put his energy into walking again--and three weeks after the accident, he miraculously took his first steps.
Take it from Elrod--with every adversity you have, accept your situation. If you want to be happy, know that you cannot change things, but know you can redirect your energy elsewhere.