It's no secret that the most likable person in the room is typically at an advantage. They receive more attention, make friends more easily, and tend to attract more opportunities than the average Joe.

If you've come across a likable person, chances are they have charisma--lots of it. And when a person has charisma, they somehow motivate and energize those around them, almost effortlessly.

You don't need to be born with charisma in order to be likable--simply work on developing your charisma at any age and soon you, too, will start to see the magic unfold. Here's how to become more charismatic:

1. Don't make it about you.

Real charisma makes your audience feel important. As Brett and Kate McKay at The Art of Manliness explain, "When you think of charisma, you might think of trying to make yourself seem super awesome to others. But the paradoxical secret of charisma is that it's not about trumpeting your good qualities, but making the other person feel good about himself."

2. Feel confident in your own skin.

Being confident will make your charisma more believable and more real. Don't be shy and timid, but don't be obnoxious and arrogant either. Figure out what you like about yourself and shine.

3. Know how to talk to others.

Develop your conversational skills and your charisma will soon follow. Know how to start a conversation, how to guide it, and what to say to make others comfortable with your presence. Practice makes perfect.

4. Be expressive.

Are you having fun, or does something give you amusement? No need to hide how you feel. A person with charisma expresses themselves in a wide variety of ways. Don't be stiff. Smile, and use your body to communicate (gestures, facial expressions, etc.). People will remember you for it.

5. Try mirroring.

Not sure what to say or do in the moment? Simply mirror the qualities that you like in the people you're with. If someone sits a certain way, or says a certain thing, mirror these gestures or behaviors back to them. Charismatic people are constantly observing how others carry themselves--this is because other people will respond well if you match their mannerisms or energy levels.

Published on: Jan 25, 2020
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